The brainchild of Poonam, who is a parent, teacher and lifestyle blogger, rolled into one, Stir Your Souls sees the author blog about all people, places, things, situations and experiences.
The blog also sees poetry, photography, creative writing, reviews, celebrity engagements and her musings on life.
The author can be reached out to, at stiryoursouls@gmail.com
With the ever-on-the-move hands of a clock, there come and go, a multitude of personalities in one's life. We being the societal beings we are, there is give-and-take involved in each facet. One of the crucial give-and-take is that of thoughts and ideas. And, occasionally, actions too. :)
More often than not, if this give-and-take of thoughts and ideas comes from elders, it turns into advice, and golden advice at that because it comes from a chronicle of their experience - be it good or bad.
It also serves as a medium for the youngsters of the family to introspect and delve deeper into lives - and seasoned lives at that!
"The people on our planet are not standing in a line single file. Look closely. Everyone is really standing in a circle, holding hands. Whatever you give to the person standing next to you, it eventually comes back to you."
I have tweaked Sir Shaw's saying a bit - "Advice is like smiling; it costs nothing, and is a pleasant thing to do."
Advice from my parents came in the form of gems, which weren't necessarily advice on the outset of it, but held deeper meaning within. Much of my being has been defined by my parents - as a pillar of support, as a cushion to fall back on in times of distress, as a close confidante and companion in times of joy or despair alike.
Life is a process. We are all works in progress - green tomatoes ripening on the window-sill of life.
Being a parent now, I can comprehend how my parents might have had similar feelings as mine.
As I experience more, learn more, and contemplate more, I often think of what use my realizations might be to my daughter. Perhaps, they also had similar sentiments of imparting to me, unsolicited advice, which was of greater utility in the longest run. Perhaps, my advice to her would someday be for her, #AdviceThatMattered. :)
One of the brightest gems that I tell my daughter to abide by is:
"There's always room for improvement;
It's the biggest room in the house."
Some of my mother's anecdotes that left a lasting impression on my individuality were:
If anything goes bad, I did it. If anything goes semi-good, we did it. If anything goes real good, then you did it.
Luck is like a chameleon. Give it a little time, and it is sure to change.
Judicious use of time is one of the major contributors to success.
Good manners sometimes means simply putting up with other people's bad manners.
The big print giveth, and the small print taketh away.
To get more out of life, give more out of yourself.
Compliment generously.
Knowledge without action goes in vain.
Be smarter than most other people. Just don't tell them so.
Promise only what you can deliver. Then, deliver more than you promise.
Some of my father's anecdotes that carved a better person out of me were:
The secret is to become wise before you get old.
If you don't stand for something, you'll fall for anything.
When you judge others, you are revealing your own fears and prejudices.
Excellence is never an accident.
Success is getting what you want. Happiness is liking what you get.
Opportunity comes disguised as problems often.
No one ever sat their way to success.
More people rust out than wear out.
Work well done is art.
To teach is to learn again.
I've always tried to abide by these principles and also believe that you must not allow weed to grow on your dreams, for the person who dreams is never alone, always motivated to let their actions be louder than their words. You're always here to live your dream for yourself, so that there's no room for regret.
That's what I did, and that is why I am here to express gratitude to my parents for being the unceasing guiding light. :)
~~~
I am blogging about my dreams and the people who helped make them true for the #AdviceThatMattered activity at BlogAdda in association with Stoodnt.
This post has been declared as one of the Winners, albeit Early Bird, in the IndiChange Contest hosted by The Story Of A Suicide and IndiBlogger.
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What is Life?
It is contained between B and D.
Between Birth and Death.
But between B and D is a C.
What is a C?
It's a Choice.
Our Life is a matter of Choices.
~~~
Each of our lives is a reality to be experienced. It is also true that one's life is not a black box in its entirety. Fortunately or not, we inhabit a society are expected to abide by societal norms and take into consideration, that are deep seated into our mindsets, from the moment we acquire the capability to comprehend them.
Also, we are one of the two sides of a scale, that is a relationship. We are not solitary beings, but have a multitude of inter-personal relationships to cater to, while subconsciously agreeing to embark on a roller-coaster ride of emotions. Each one of us has a role to play in every other person's life, whomever we come across.
However, the most important fact of our lives remains that each stage of life has a lesson for us to imbibe into ourselves and learn from as we herald one of them and bid farewell to another, throughout our lifetime.
Charles Swindoll had said that life is 10% what happens to us and 90% how we react to it. I could not have agreed more, as each incident acts as a stimuli for us to react, guided by our heart and mind. More often than not, we are caught at a fork in the road. We are perplexed, confused by the plethora of reactions, sometimes an emotional outburst resulting as a consequence of a stressful situation.
Often, we are able to navigate our way through the maze. Often, we are not. We end up losing track of how we wanted to tackle a particular situation versus what was meant to be done. The way out is introspection and advice. Advice from our parents, friends, our confidante, someone who is able to comprehend our dilemma and guide us out of it. Introspection towards the pros and cons of the way in way in which we react can often chalk out a way toward the workaround.
Nothing happens until we are able to decide as to which way our life moves forward, though. It is also true, that bad decisions make for good stories. Stories that make way for good decisions, as good decisions come from experience, which in turn comes from bad decisions. :)
Ups and downs, highs and lows are all part and parcel of life, as a consequence of the decisions we make and abide by. However, no circumstance is worse enough for one to decide to commit suicide. However evident it may seem that suicide is the way out, it is not. For it is the one bad decision that would not make for a good story and certainly not pave any way for any decisions thereafter!
Suicidal tendencies are silent killers, finally culminating into the terrifying act, that has repercussions towards one's family, friends, near and dear ones. It leaves them dumbfounded to discover such a harsh truth. After all, suicide appears to be the ultimate escape. However, escapism is easy, no doubt. But, it takes courage to beat adversity in the face! :)
~~~
The other day, I had come across The Story Of A Suicide, a novel penned by Sriram Ayer and illustrated by Ghana. The moment I sat down to give it a read, I was impressed by the fact that it brought to the fore, an unexplored dimension of what goes on inside the mind of a person who is led to believe that suicide is the ultimate answer to all questions.
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How does the mindset work and why does it work in the manner it does? I was intrigued by such queries and I decided to go ahead. The name itself, was interesting enough to prompt me to take the plunge.
Turns out, it is a narrative encompassing the lives of four individuals, youngsters, whose lives cross each other's path on the premise of love, passion, revenge and deceit. Focusing on the lives of Hari, Sam, Charu, and Mani (in that order). It is a depiction that mirrors real-life. The mannerisms of the youth of today's times have been depicted prolifically, with the extensive reference to gadgets, blogs, social media interactions, Twitter Mentions (using @) and Twitter hashtags (using #). Quite commonplace, and relate-able in today's social media-savvy era.
Social media is already touted as the harbinger of change, acting as a bearer of public opinion, and the novel depicts just that. Also, being adolescents, The Story Of A Suicide relates the changeover from school to college life to the dynamism and excitement of a teenager. From the hostel culture prevalent in premier institutes in the country to the typical aggregation of peer pressure to the involvement of youth in new relationships to the affinity towards newer (and often misguiding) passions and desires, the portrayal of these real-life scenarios provide a reminisce of college life for most of us.
The novel also explores various personalities, mindsets, feelings, emotions, reactions, and incidents in the backdrop of realism across a span of thirty-one chapters. The fact that it begins with a Diary Entry addressing the World, and with the proclamation of the fact that the individual is going to die is itself gripping and leads the reader to explore Who it is and Why is he/she proclaiming so.
Quoting Kirthi Jayakumar, who is the Campaign Manager for The Story Of A Suicide:
"A young person decides to commit suicide. Who is this person? Why does he/she want to die? Where do they come from? Why are they upset, depressed and torn apart? And what drives them to it? Does he/she really die?"
~~~
"I am sad. I am tired. Helpless. Disillusioned. Paranoid. Unhappy.
Sorry, it would not do justice if I just gave only one adjective to describe my hurt."
The multitude of emotions in the above line depicts the demotivated, helpless and pained state of mind and heart. The narrative reached its superlative twice, for me.
First, with the letter that Hari writes to Sam, establishing the first connection between two individual characters. 'Our Secret' shows signs of seeing light.
Second, when the drama scales the height and 'Caesar Meets Draupadi'.
~~~
The fact that The Story Of A Suicide is "the first ever book presented online, the first ever book that you get to read for free, without even having to pirate a copy, the first ever book that you’ll leave bookmarks all over without do-gearing or marking blue flags on" is welcoming.
The 'How Do I?' pointers that accompany each chapter are reflective, introspective, and serve as a counsel. The questions highlighted would make some of the disillusioned youth, reading the novel, that they too, were seeking answers to some such troubling queries.
The Story Of A Suicide highlights the fact that today's generation is expressive, independent, fearless, dynamic, but at the same time, spirited. Bound by a world that presents them with unexpected challenges, and pressing expectations, today's youngsters form for a disillusioned lot. Figuring out their purpose in life, today's youth is constantly faced by a predicament. The difference of opinion with their elders also conflicts their personal opinions, at times.
Clouded by concerns the multiple facets that make them the individuals they are, be it about their education, relationships, jobs, sexuality, bullying, or abuse, they are audacious enough to say it in the face of adversity - Try Me! - instead of - Why Me? - thus coming to terms with the vulnerability that deters them from achieving their dreams, and keeping it at bay. They are thus, at a constant war, with their own selves!
The novel would aid such youth to come to terms with themselves and resolve to carve an identity for themselves with positivism that makes an effort to oppose the negativity that the world around us is brimming with.
Also, the Audio Book hosted on SoundCloud that is poignantly conveyed across, with the right tone and expressions (narrative alongside each chapter by Uday Danda) is what makes one feel that the screenplay comes alive from across the room! :)
I had listened to the novel rather than reading it, and believe me, it was not your computerized text-to-speech but it was as if the novelist was speaking out the contents of his literary marvel that touches upon a critical subject.
With a team of twelve individuals who have given shape to the novel and brought it out for the world, The Story Of A Suicide makes for a promising read, complemented by fitting visuals, metaphors, tone, and imagery, along with a diction that establishes a firm connect with the dialect of today's youth.
On the other hand, realization of the importance of 'I' in one's life is essential. As it is 'I' who assumes responsibility for my actions, decisions, emotional outbursts, and it is 'I' who has to bear the consequences of the same.
It is 'I' who has to care for myself, none else is going to come and do that for me. After all, 'I' live in a big, bad, selfish world. To each one their own, because this is a society that 'I' aspire to survive in, not a factory churning out robots as per a predefined mold!
'I' must however, also keep in mind, that as rosy as the picture may seem after one takes a spur-of-moment decision, it doesn't take long enough for it to take the shape of regret in the long term.
~~~
Your skin is not a paper, don't cut it,
Your face isn't a mask, don't hide it,
Your size isn't a book, don't judge it,
Your life is not a film, don't END it.
~~~
P.S.: Images attributed to The Story Of A Suicide. This post is written for an IndiChange campaign, hosted by IndiBloggerand NalandaWay Foundation.
This post has been declared as one of the Winners in the IndiChange Contest hosted by The Story Of A Suicide and IndiBlogger.
~~~
L;fe ;s s;m;lar to a sem;colon.
It could have been ended, but it wasn't. :)
~~~
The Story of a Suicide is written by Sriram Ayer and illustrated by Ghana. Illustrations are as fabulous as the story. The story is more than what that title says. It is about hope and a stimulus to the youth to bring them to a level where they are empowered to stay alive, motivated, and strong.
Nobody should think about committing suicide as this is not an act of courage. First of all a person should avoid such situations where one's self-confidence borders the extent of void, and the person is forced to believe that it is best not to stay hand in hand with life. There are many ways of doing it. There are many ways of staying alive in this real world without losing a bit of courage and hope. The only thing required is a sound mind - positive thoughts and will-power to stay strong under all circumstances.
The Story of a Suicide by Sriram Ayer is a story of four main characters – Sam, Charu, Hari, and Mani. All four have lead their own life, have their own routine. And none of them on this Earth is devoid of any stresses or issues in life. Each of them has to face a number of problems from time to time. And each one carves her/his own way to deal with such situations and keep negativity at bay.
The most important thing is to never give up under such conditions as depression in life. If we keep fighting and aim towards success, no failure can deter us for long. That is where each of the thirty-one chapters of this fantastic book keeps conveying from time to time. Each chapter intrigues and prompts to introspect. That way the book is a must read for all youth and parents, especially. On a second thought, I think everyone should read this book.
Being a teacher there have been many instances in my life where I have seen students sink into depression and helplessness. They reach to an extent where they see no way out of their problems. This makes them surrender totally and ultimately stop trying to find the way out of the maze.
At times, it is their friends or peers that have an involvement in such situations. Another important factor that can bring youth to this corner is pressure from parents. Though time has changed and parents are much liberal now, but there have been many instances when a young boy or girl is rejected in the family because of various reasons. That rejection causes negative impacts in life. And at time it reaches to an extent where suicide seems the only way out to be away from such situations.
The Story of a Suicide by Sriram Ayer is woven so artistically to create a kind of situation in front of the reader with a set of pointers at the end of every chapter. That set of pointers is a unique feature in this book. These pointers help in realizing the crux of real life where similar kinds of situations arise.
These situations like social anxiety, peer pressure, cyber-bullying, bullying, sexual harassment, rape etc. are such that the victim starts living under guilt. This starts drifting him away from life. This book motivates and helps to stay away from such guilt and harbor positivism.
We are not humans. We parallel our lifestyle in today's times with that of a mechanized robot, whose gotten too busy making a living, that he's forgotten to make a life.
Come to think of it, we are merely existing, not living. A majority of the human race today is busy meeting deadlines, running errands, completing projects, putting ourselves together.
Our lifestyle is now governed by not what we would LIKE to pursue, but what we HAVE to do. Our only folly? It had been aptly highlighted by David Muecke.
"A hectic life usually lacks attention to detail, and often the details are people."
I would like to add my two cents to it by saying that most often, those people who lack our attention also include our own selves.
Being a woman who has been (attempting to) maintain the work-life balance since the past three decades, I can testify to the fact that I realize too, that I neglect my physical well-being every now and then owing to various factors which influence our lives and lifestyles in today's so called modern world.
Progressing towards a perpetually connected world also weighs heavily on the yardstick of maintaining good health too, thus limiting my physical activity.
Our lax and lazy-bones alter ego has been successfully overpowering our active and on-the-go self, over the years.
Especially us ladies - we overlook the fact that this ignorance - towards our own well-being - is NOT bliss now. A bane rather than a boon, in the long run, would surface, where we might have to confront long-term illnesses.
Gradually, it is becoming harder to realize that physical activity is more about physical endurance - brisk walking, jogging, working out, Yoga - and less and less about just running errands and doing the chores of the house.
I feel that the time is not far when our muscles, organs, and even the heart would go on strike against our nonchalant attitude towards our soul's temple - our precious body.
Given the increasingly harrowing time constraint of twenty-four hours - 'just' twenty-four hours in a day which seem too small a time-frame to pass, existing through our daily routines, most of us - including myself - have to make time to spend on and to pamper ourselves.
That pampering is also when we decide to take time out of our so-called 'busy schedule' to spend some of it upping the 'physical activity' meter.
Fortunately or not, it now takes us a 'test' to remind us on a scale of 'Just Keep Going' to 'Take Immediate Action' how ignorant we've truly been.
~~~
I am talking about Saffolalife and their #ProtectHerHeart initiative which prompted me to take their Weight-Heart Test to come to terms with some awe-inspiring facts regarding my own self.
Based on providing some vital stats, I was greeted by 'Kindly Take A Note'. I hope that this Note does not lose its way through the numerous Post-It Notes on an erstwhile office desk!
I sincerely do.
It also presented a clearer picture of how this anchor of the family's walk over turbulent water is ever-proceeding towards accumulating rust.
There are some pointers which I hope to adopt, towards the achievement of a healthier me and a healthier heart on my inside, just in time for my Birthday this month. For it is my heart which bears the brunt of not only emotional and psychological but also physical ordeals.
Well, of course, it won't be a 'build-in-a-night' case in point. It would take persistence and determination. And, I've made a promise to myself. My spouse has made it to himself and to me too. We've pledged to #ProtectHerHeart because we don't want these figures to engulf her while she rudders the house and home impressively albeit neglecting her own self all the time.
Most certainly, we would not like the consequences of lack of self-care to profess themselves on her delicate being down the timeline too.
That Her in #ProtectHerHeart is Yours Truly. :)
~~~
Well, I have prepared a seven-point checklist to ensure that we - my better half and me are able to match ourselves up to the seemingly herculean task of #ProtectHerHeart to achieve a healthier lifestyle for both of us.
That checklist goes by the acronym PROTECT. Each letter signifies a minor addition or change to our present-day routine which would add up to a major improvement over the horizon.
Put Our Hearts Together, Pledge Together...
Rationalize Those Pros-Cons, Become Better...
Outsmarting Each Other With The Pep Talks...
To Alleviate Stresses Over Some Brisk Walks...
Evaluating What's On Our Plates Over Dinner...
Coming Through Each Day As A Person, Fitter...
The Worries Vanish As We #ProtectHerHeart!
In addition to this, religiously following a sharing of household duties, getting up to obtain some fresh air, each day - inhale and exhale - deep breathing, along with pushing ourselves for that forsaken Health Checkup, would go a long way in assisting us to uphold our Pledge.
We've promised ourselves to fulfill this Pledge to #ProtectHerHeart over the year. Have you and your better half taken it up too? :)
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I am joining the Saffolalife #ProtectHerHeart initiative and pledging my support to better heart health in Association with BlogAdda.
There is one corner of my house that makes me want to be there, every time I have a problem to solve or if I am feeling lonely. I often end up posing a question to my inner self - What is so special about that corner? What makes me so energetic and brings me back on the track the moment I feel low or lose sight of my aim? Is it some hidden secret that I will never come to know or is it something that is there in the back of my mind that I have never been able to recollect?
I remember my childhood days when on rare occasions I had a not-so-good time in school. Being a topper in all subjects throughout and an excellent badminton player, I was always an apple of my teachers' eye. I was not only admired as the best sports person of my school but was also applauded among the brilliant and intelligent lot of the school. Besides academics and sports, I also used to actively participate in dramatics, orations and other such co-curricular activities.
That was the reason for 'bad day at school' being a rare instance, but I'm not negating the fact that there used to be times when I was not able to reply to a question directed to me by my teacher in front of the class, or when I had not been able to solve a question. That was the time when I used to feel very bad about it and during the rest of the time in school, I used to crave to reach out to that corner in my house.
That craving stayed with me all along, during my journey through school days, college days and even during the initial phase of my career. I remember, there used to be times when the whole family would be excited to go to an outing together, but for me, it was always more exciting a time to spend few minutes every day in that corner of my house in solitude, in introspection.
My Mother, after realizing that it was the most soothing and peaceful moments which I spent in that corner, kept the most auspicious holy books of all religions in that corner and also placed some beautiful pictures of various Gods and Goddesses there. That corner always was, has always been and will always be the best corner of my world where I experience happiness, and bliss, along with the motivation to #CelebrateLife every time I go there.
Probably that is the reason why even after so many years I have not forgotten that corner of my house.
~~~
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Today's Prompt was a 'Free Prompt' provided to all of us, Guest Authors.
The Prompt is, Happily Ever After - 'And They Lived Ever After...
Words that all of us have read in so many books, famous last words...
Think about that line for a few minutes. Are you living happily ever after?
If not, what will it take for you to get there?'
This is my Second Post as a guest author to Project 365 : We Post Daily!
How often do you get to hear that One Word with Three Magical Letters?
Rarely?
Or
Oft?
~~~
To WIN Is An Achievement...
Well, So Do Opine, Many!
To WIN Is A Pursuit...
Well, So Do I Opine!
~~~
WINNING is a Pursuit...
Pursuit Of Joy!
Pursuit Of Fulfillment...
Pursuit Of Determined Advances!
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WINNING is a Pursuit...
Pursuit Of Honest Attempts...
Pursuit Of 'The Best Foot Forward'...
Pursuit Of Exploration...
~~~
WINNING is a Pursuit...
Pursuit Of Renewed Benchmarks...
Pursuit Of Outshining Oneself...
Pursuit Of Surpassing One's Targets...
~~~
To WIN is a way of life, a perpetual rhythm of learning, in the midst all its happenings...
To WIN is the essence of Life, itself!
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Each episode in each one's Life constitutes a WIN!
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The first cry of a baby - IS A WIN!
A first cry points to a new beginning, a new life...
Life, thus begins with a WIN!
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The first steps of a baby - ARE A WIN!
The first steps point to a the birth of an adventurer...
The individual's pursuit of exploration of new avenues begins with a WIN!
~~~
The first word of a baby - IS A WIN!
The first spoken sound points to the birth of a communicator...
The individual's pursuit of advance towards expression begins with a WIN!
~~~
The first steps of a baby towards many second homes, (be it school or college) the temples of learning - IS A WIN!
The first steps towards gaining knowledge point to the birth of an intellectual...
The individual's pursuit of an insatiable desire for knowledge begins with a WIN!
~~~
The first steps of a youth, towards financial stability, a firm career - ARE A WIN!
The first advancement towards productive contribution for one's own well being points to the birth of an individual acknowledging responsibility towards self...
The individual's pursuit of responsibility towards oneself begins with a WIN!
~~~
The first steps of an individual, towards familial avenues, marriage - ARE A WIN!
The first furtherance towards a realization of expanding the family tree points to the birth of an individual acknowledging responsibility towards family...
The individual's pursuit of responsibility towards family begins with a WIN!
~~~
The first steps of an individual towards senility - ARE A WIN!
The first dawn of senility points to the birth of a second childhood - the one of narrowing distances from the Almighty...
The individual's pursuit of seeking the Almighty begins with a WIN!
~~~
The first steps of a soul towards liberation from mortal bonds - ARE A WIN!
The first aura of the Divine Light points to the birth of a soul's perpetual cycle of life and demise...
The individual's pursuit of oneness with the Almighty begins and ends with a WIN!
~~~
WINNING Is The Destiny...
Of Each One's Life...
And The Destination...
Of Each One's Soul...
~~~
WINNING Is The Cerebration...
Of Life!
The Celebration...
Of Life!
~~~
This post is written as a part of the WINNING - India Today Conclave 2014 Contest organized by India Today for the Conclave to be held in Delhi on March 7 & 8, 2014 in association with IndiBlogger.
Honor Killing -- The term itself is wrong. How can a human being kill someone for his honor? This is sheer frustration which is transformed into false mannerisms of these people.
We are trying hard to make India a developed nation but Can We?
Not By Any Chance If We Continue To Tread On This Path.
We would just be reverting back to the barbarian era. It is a matter of shame for the society that even in the Twenty First Century, people are following the so - called 'Khap Panchayats' and not our Constitution. How can few self - acclaimed and self - centrist heads of these 'Panchayats' declare the brutal sentence for two adult individuals capable of taking their lives' own decisions without interfering in anybody else's life? Moreover, what do they get by killing two innocent souls --- Ego Satisfaction! I wonder how the family can detach themselves from their offsprings so heartlessly! What is more important for them -- their child's happiness or their pride as per the societal norms?
Every individual has a right to live his/her life on their own terms unless this harms anyone. Hence the enlightenment of the deep psyche of these brutal beasts is the urgent need of the hour. The need of the hour is to urge ourselves to Ring The Bell of our hearts, minds and souls...
