Friday 11 March 2016

There's No Pride In Being Prejudiced!

The novel of manners is tasteful in its own right, focussing a reader's attention to conversations, customs, coming to face the mannerisms and an intrinsic thought process of another's social standing.

It would be befitting to pen down the novel of manners to make today's woman and man rub shoulders with the presence and prevalence of mirage-like idealisms in the times we inhabit, in order to balance the scales.

An individual's standing in the society, must, after all, not be parameterized by the degrees of success and failure to match up with a mere herd mentality, but by how uniquely distinguished one is, from the same! For, there's no fun in contorting oneself to fit the bill which has been tampered with, countless number of times.

Jane Austen is most noted as a novelist for presenting to her readers, a sense of realism in her writings, commenting and critiquing upon the perceptions of society, often marred by judgements over how an individual chose to represent themselves to the masses. Appreciation by scholars and readers alike has made Jane's works to be admired as classics over the last two centuries.

 I was compelled to think about how the novel of manners would be rephrased in today's times, thanks to a striking advert from Ariel, which spoke about gender bias being the 'talk of the town'. Given that, today's audience, ironically, is all empowered towards issues of the likes of 'women empowerment', I wondered how it would be for them to leave aside their Pride and shun all Prejudice.

How would it be for Austen's classic 'Pride and Prejudice' to be rewritten in tune to prevalent ideologies? Picture this rephrase by Yours Truly, for instance.

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With its protagonist,  Elizabeth Bennet, the second of the five daughters of a gentlemanly Mr Bennet, Pride and Prejudice would proceed thus. Elizabeth's father, Mr Bennet, is a humble man who is mindful of his responsibilities towards his family. Elizabeth's mother, Mrs Bennet, on the other hand, is occupied with finding suitable husbands for her five daughters, who intend not to inherit much from their father. The eldest daughter, Jane Bennet's richness of character is attributed to her kindness and beauty; Elizabeth Bennet has in common with her father, the gift of witty, yet sarcastic perspective; Mary is identified as studious and devout while Catherine and Lydia are flirtatious and naive. The Bennet family puts up in Longbourn.

Elizabeth in particular, shares close ties with her father, closer than any of her sisters, not only because she's similar to him in most aspects but also owing to the fact that she has always been appreciative of his willingness to lend a shoulder to her mother over matters of the estate. As a matter of fact, she had, as a young girl, seen her father caring more about homely matters than her mother!

A certain Mr Bingley and Mr Darcy's arrival in the neighbourhood captures the attention of the Bennet family, who are on the lookout for prompt suitors! They had heard someone say that a wealthy, charismatic and sociable young bachelor, was moving into Netherfield Park in the neighbourhood. While Mr Bingley is well received, his friend Mr Darcy makes a less favourable impression as he appears proud and condescending at the first instance.

While Jane tends to like Mr Bingley's outspoken nature, she does not let the cat out of the bag yet. On the other hand, Mr Darcy disregards Elizabeth, who returns the gesture too.

On the first visit to Mr Bingley's house, Elizabeth and Jane are surprised by and appreciate the fact that the gentlemen have cared for the upkeep of their humble abode, all by themselves. One would not be able to say that there was not one lady in the house, for it to be so spick-and-span! Perhaps, both the men possessed the quality of not shying away from housework, apart from the appreciative characteristics to their personality too.

Elizabeth and Jane, thus end up admiring the men for being like their father in this respect, among themselves.

Mr Collins, a clergyman and heir to the Bennet estate, comes to visit the family. Mr Bennet and Elizabeth are much amused by his inadvertent fawning towards his employer, the noble Lady Catherine de Bourgh, as well as by his self-important and doctrinaire nature. Apparently, he arrives in Longbourn to choose a wife from among the Bennet sisters, and Jane is singled out, but because of Jane's budding romance with Mr Bingley, Mrs Bennet directs him toward Elizabeth.

After refusing his advances, much to her mother's disbelief and dread, Elizabeth instead familiarises with Mr Wickham, a militia officer who accuses Mr Darcy of severe mistreatment despite having been Darcy's father's favourite. The accusation and her attraction to Mr Wickham both increase Elizabeth's dislike of Mr Darcy.

The following morning, Mr Collins proposes to Elizabeth, who puts down the proposal. Mr Collins recovers and promptly becomes engaged to Elizabeth's close friend Charlotte Lucas, who is a homely woman. Collins thus puts forward the notion of most men aiming for a good, devout wife, who immerses herself in household chores of the likes of cooking, cleaning, washing and not one productive task beyond that! Perhaps, he had held high, his impression as a young lad, of his mother single-handedly organising the household. Mr Bingley abruptly returns to London, which devastates Jane, and Elizabeth becomes convinced that Mr Darcy and Bingley's sister Caroline have conspired to separate her sister from him.

After a few months, Elizabeth visits Charlotte and Mr Collins. Darcy visits them at the same time too. Thus, Elizabeth is no mood to accept when Darcy arrives and, quite unexpectedly, confesses love for her and begs her hand in marriage. His proposal is flattering, to say the least, but it is delivered in an inappropriate manner.

Elizabeth rebukes him, and a heated discussion follows; she confronts him about her sister and Bingley, with treating Mr Wickham disgracefully and with having conducted himself towards her in an arrogant manner. Mr Darcy, shocked, ultimately responds with a letter giving a good account of his actions. Elizabeth, who had previously condemned his behaviour, is forced to admit the truth of Mr Darcy's observations and begins to see that she has misjudged him. She, quite rightly, attributes her impressionistic opinion to his coldness towards herself at the beginning of their acquaintance.

That the misunderstanding had given way to a prospective match was a matter of joy, as both Darcy and Elizabeth had harboured soft corners for each other on their insides, knowingly or not.

~~~ 

Hence, being appreciative of Mr Bennet's, Bingley's and Darcy's inherent initiation towards a participative outlook in housework, and thoroughly condemning Mr Collin's attitude towards Charlotte is the key to household equality. That's because matrimony is not just about walking hand in hand with those ceremonial vows in tow. Matrimony is also about pacing shoulder to shoulder with familial responsibilities in tow. It's best to #ShareTheLoad in all aspects - be it psychologically, physically, emotionally or even economically! :) 

As a matter of fact, it is high time that we, as a society, shun the patriarchal dominance, gender bias, and the burden of social obligation to realise for the best, that:

There is no... 

Parity Not Prejudice Is Called For... 
Rhetoric Mindsets To Be Gone, Now!
Instilling Self Belief As Was Before...
Discovering Oneself Anew, And How! 
Expressing An Equilibrium, Sans Furore

in being... 

Perspectives Change, So Does Time...
Respecting #ShareTheLoad At Home
Etching Out Division Of Tasks, Prime
Juggle Work & Home Or Build Rome?
Undecided Which One's A Tough Climb
Dads, Moms - It's One Taxing Genome!
Idling Around's Definitely, The Crime...
Come On, Lend A Hand, Y Chromosome!
Effectively, Not A Role Model In Time...
Damned If Gen X Doesn't #ShareTheLoad

~~~ 


I am joining the Ariel #ShareTheLoad campaign at BlogAdda and blogging about the prejudice related to household chores being passed on to the next generation. 

P.S.: The plot summary of Austen's novel has been taken from Wikipedia and has been given a spin-off in line with the said campaign. 

Tuesday 1 March 2016

Thy Will Be Done!


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A kingdom is as good as its king. But you know very well that at home there is no king. Every home is governed by a queen. You have all rights to behave as a king outside but at home, it is only a queen and her subjects. Well, you are my favorite subject. You do a lot for me. But then you know a queen is a queen. And this queen is quite demanding. Let me demand some promises from you today. And you have to promise to give me all these promises from the bottom of your heart. Once you promise, remember to keep them for life. A promise is never meant to be broken. If you intend to break a promise, never make it. And once you make it, never break it. So here we go.

We have hardly spent twenty-three years together. Promise me to keep admiring the beauty of the whole universe in my eyes as you have been doing till now. Remember when we met the first time, you admiringly looked into my eyes, took a long dip and stayed there for a long time. It was as if you never wanted to come out of it ever. I had to pull you out. In fact, if I had not done so, tears would have started. It was difficult to control my eyes to blink. It was becoming too painful. I tried my best to keep them intact without a single blink as long as possible. The universe and eyes are still there and will be there as long as the most admiring soul is there. You are that soul.

My second demand is that you will wake me up every morning as you have been doing for all these years. It is because when I open my eyes every morning and see your face, my day is bound to be fantastic without any doubt. The same I want to happen as long as you, me and our universe is. So promise me to wake me up every morning with your usual style and a hot cup of tea. Morning tea is as dear to me as you.

My third demand is to let me be the queen of the house. That can happen only if the king decides to hand over all his powers to his queen. Because when I am happy I can make your world. Promise me to give me so much space to let me use my powers of being the queen of the house.


~~~

I’m blogging about the kasams I want from my man this Women’s Day with the #SadaSexy activity at BlogAdda in association with Set Wet.


Promises Anew!

Every woman is a good judge. In fact, all men are from Mars and all women are from Venus as well as Jupiter, signifying the combination of beauty and brains! That is how the world is still in existence. It is the woman power that is keeping it alive and worthy of living. I am a part of that woman power. I have a lot of aspirations for my husband. If I have to elucidate to him what promises I would love him to make for me, I would prefer to address him by the means of my blog and writing.

So, here goes an ode to my Dear Husband...

I love your company but at times, I wish for privacy - being contained to myself. So when I want you around, I really need to have you around. And if I, at certain occasions, don’t feel like being with anyone,  you have to understand the silence and leave me alone, even if for a short while, without my being vocal about it, and without you taking it otherwise, of course. So the first promise is to hone your skills to be a super intuitive guy who understands when the green bulb is lit and when it is time to dodge the red bulb.

You, in fact, are already a super intuitive guy. That is why you are in my life. You have to keep your receptive towers always functioning well so as to read the signals correctly and unasked for. Promise me, that you will try your best to put your best foot forward in this regard.

You always praise me for my expertise in the kitchen but I would also wish for you to develop some apprentice-like abilities. Promise me, that you would, at least, attempt to learn the ropes  to cooking by yourself, some day. But, mind you, you should not try to make me spoon-feed my knowledge while developing this skill in yourself.

You should not poke me often asking what quantity of which ingredient, how much time to be taken to simmer or boil, which spices and all that. You should have to apply your brain and learn yourself. It should like a DIY for you. One point of caution, however, is that you must never claim to better at this art than me. This mastery from your side is never-ever possible.

I love reading books. You too, love reading books. Although our choice and taste in this regard are poles apart, we should promise to one another to read books of each other's choice. It is so because I love to discuss books. So when we both finish a book you will have to brainstorm its story with me without any excuse.

Also, promise me to read books for me when I am in not in a mood to do so. Promise to sit near me and read that book for me. Once in a while, I would also prefer to hear a lovely story flowing to my ears through your words rather than reading it on my own!

~~~ 

I’m blogging about the kasams I want from my man this Women’s Day with the #SadaSexy activity at BlogAdda in association with Set Wet.